Racing as a team in a stage race is way more fun than the Internet makes it out to be!
The Macedon ranges are cold, really cold, and driving from Melbourne to Lancefield in a rusty old car that has no heater in the middle of winter is also really really cold. Rolling into Lancefield, with the temperature hovering just over 4 deg and clear skies, Matty Gray greets me with, ‘What are you even doing here? It's too cold for you!’. I couldn't answer...
The teams aspect in local racing, whilst officially forbidden, was obvious at this years three day tour. Saint Cloud Racing had 5 riders in the B grade bunch! Five! With that many riders we were pretty sure something exciting had to happen over the duration of the tour. Team Coburg looked very Euro in their fuchsia pink kit, clearly trying to take the title of the most handsome team away from Saint Cloud. Katsonis had even gone to the effort of adopting a trademark "Allen" moustache. The competition was clearly on before the race had begun! Team Bicycle Network Victoria also looked very dapper.
#dreamboat
The start of the first stage in a Northern Combine 3 day tour is a bizarre experience, no-one really wants to be on the front, the pace isn’t really that hot, and there are another three stages weighing on everyone’s mind. Stage one followed this description, for Saint Cloud Racing, our plan was to keep it together and let Steve ‘Mad Dog’ Duggan win the sprint for the stage and take the leaders jersey and the rest of us would drink beers.
This photo clearly illustrates that the pressure was on for most of the race
With the propensity of Mitch ‘the moustache boss’ to became bored and hit the front of the bunch driving the pace, the plan was working pretty well, few serious breaks managed to form. But the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray, and ours was no exception, 15 km in Duggans unfortunate punny forced a change of plan; keep the bunch together making sure the race isn’t blown apart by a break - leaving Matt high in GC and then drink beers.
The stage ambled on according to plan B, no serious breaks with the most interesting aspect being the intriguing battle for KOM between Lynton Zawadzki (team Canard) and Fraser Short (italo-Australian). Lynton seemed to take the upper hand collecting the bulk of the points on offer.
The boys kept a close eye on Slingsby and Macauley - both strong GC contenders
Saint Cloud friend, Chris Mason, kept the bunch together on the last KOM, and the race finished in a, as is typical, controversial bunch sprint. People diving across the lines, people yelling to keep left, mostly because they were annoyed that they were getting boxed in on the left. Without Duggan contesting the sprint, Saint Cloud was anonymous, tucking in the bunch, and rolling across the line.
Ed: "Did I win? Haven't seen that Duggan all day. Was he up the road?"
Jez ‘The Cross Boss’, Spiro, Mat and myself finished on the same time as the stage winner, skin intact. GC hopefuls all in contention. And so with stage one down, I got a Danny’s burger (double with the lot) and drank a beer.
After the mornings time trial we had 3 riders in the top 10 (might have been 4 had Mitch not been made to take his TT bars off when it was noticed he was missing a bar plug..) Mat currently in 2nd was our highest placed GC contender. TT's are sort of fun to do but hugely boring to hear about unless you like stats on how much snot can make it from your nose to your mouth or how to clean a beard covered in boogers and Gel's. I'll spare you...
Mat on a flyer for 2nd
Spiro looked the biz. Derr...
Ask Mitch what happened on the start line. I dare you.
Before the start of the stage Duggan, who had a punny the day before made it known that he was headed up the road from the gun. Being 20+ minutes down it was unlikely anyone would give too much chase, this plan was however nullified when during the neutral stage Spiro decided exercise his knowledge of the rule book and sit right on the pace car. Calls from the peloton to "GET OFF THE CAR" were easily shaken off by the man in the fancy shoes, he was briefly joined by Chris Mason who though better and rolled back to the bunch.
As we ambled toward the proposed start Spiro was joined by a Sunbury rider in Paddy Mac (rumours abound that Paddy may have been chief instigator in the calls to remove thyself from the comforting low pressure area trailing the car....?) Luckily however the blue of the Sunbury kit closely matched Spiro's shoes and with color co-ordination taken care of as soon as the flag dropped the two were away in what I'm calling... THE SICKEST MOVE OF THE WEEKEND
The two worked well, quickly getting out of sight. Leader on the road and fellow Brunswick CC member, Brendan O'Loughlan, looking noticeably nervous as we crested hills with no sight of the opportunistic escapees. Most of the bunch however happy to let them have their fun. Pace escalated briefly before the KOM with Italo CC's Fraser Short and (Saint Cloud Nemesis) Team Canard's Lynton Zawadzki still fighting it out for the last point up for grabs. Pace then slowed again and people took on food and water round the flatter back side of the course. 55 or so Km in we started to see our earlier break of two yo-yo back towards us always just out of reach from the concerted efforts to bring them back, with about 35km to go however they were bought back into the fold receiving pats on the back all round for having a red hot crack at it.
With the kilometers ticking over, as if by osmosis Mitch, Adrian and I decided the pace needed to be lifted in the run up to the last hill to make sure nothing else got away. Big rings were selected, top tubes were tea bagged, calls of WOOT were exchanged; bike racing is FKN awesome. As the hill loomed we paid for our earlier tomfoolery drifting from the front to the back of the remaining buch (Ed. - Duggan totally owned the clowns up the climb) but just managing to hold on for the flat-ish finish.
With much of the peloton having not seen the front all day, the finish was surgey and sketchy with many riders trying to gain position by crossing the centre line. With our notable sprinter, Duggan, thinking better of the situation after being blocked by numerous punters' massive 5 meter effort to failure on front of him, we all rolled in happy to take bunch time and not lose any skin.
Looking around after the finish we noticed the absence of Brendan O'Loughlan, thus making Mat the new GC leader in a tightly grouped top 5 going into the final day.
Other notable mention of the day goes to Riley Terrens who scored second in the sprint after having (allegedly) stopped to take a leak. Picking up a whole swag of gnar points to go along with his sprint winnings.
BAM
Fonz outling where all the dicks who made position on the wrong side of the road had been all day.
Last stage of the 3DT brought us back to Kyneton show grounds which had an element of Groundhog Day - what a banger of a movie! Cold again, and a nightmare fog straight out of Pet Cemetery saw the stage delayed an hour and cut short a lap. I was holding onto the GC lead by a mere 8 seconds- and with KOM and Line time bonuses up for grabs it was due to be an aggressive 60km. We also had young Riley Terrens (16 years and first season in seniors) in third place GC, who we wanted to get up to 2nd place.
5 km in our first lap was brought back under control. Word is that it was due to an A grade socialite being so excited by his new under the counter spray on tan he recently picked up he lost his line, and took out a couple of Bike Gallery riders
(Ed: Note this is a viscous and unsubstantiated rumour. JUST THE WAY WE LIKE IT).
Young Riley saving his cookies for the last ascent.
GC Contenders keeping near the front and an eye on each other.
Gas back on and first KOM went down with the Coburg boys not putting in the expected attack. Soon after a group of five smacked it off for a break with Jez going with. They all worked well splitting the KOM points and also putting in a minute on the bunch.
Young "Aero Slingsby" was in the group with a team mate, which was raising some concern in the Coburg camp as he was a threat for Macaulay's podium spot. After some discussion between the teams, with Jez up the road hoping to soak up time bonuses it was left to Coburg to monitor the time gap. Katsonis and Roberts moved to the front and did some excellent chasing holding the gap to about a minute.
Macauley rode excellently - never far from the front.
After Jez had successfully soaked up some of the time bonuses available, the time had come to bring them back with Mitch, Duggan and Fonz pulling big turns on tired legs, Spiro hanging out the back in case of any mechanicals.
Immaculate as ever.
The Coburg boys came to town and put in some efforts to aid bringing the escapees back with 10km to go. We had controlled the race all weekend, and it didn't let up, with Mitch and Steve smashing it through the final rollers into the last and decisive climb. I ended up riding with Macaulay (second in GC) and his teammate Lilley (Forth) at the start of the climb. Lachie B made a leap early on which started the chain reaction- it was all go up the last pinch and the drag down the to the line. Terrens had put in a stellar tour and was keen to add to it, proving to be the best of the day taking a solid leap for first, Guy Green pulling second and I rolled through for 3rd whilst Duggan took a breath to practice his wheelies up the KOM.
Terrens was awarded with a time bonus moving him into a well earned 2nd in GC and a warning to future A graders that this boy can ride strong and smart. I was stoked to pull off the GC overall, much due to all the work that the boys had put in throughout the weekend. They all rode smart and fair all weekend, seeing Mitch, Jez and the Fonz leading the group down into Metcalf on Sunday was my highlight and made it clear why I liked racing with the SC crew.
Racing bikes is sick!!!
As a side note - there was a bit of a kerfuffle at the end of Stage 4 about how close the tour finished between the top GC riders. Duggan stepped in and elaborated on how it would have been totally different if he hadn't got a punny.
"I'm sorry guys. I would have won by about 5 minutes if I hadn't got that punny. It won't happen again"
Nick: Day 1 was pretty much the easiest 90k race Dave and I had ever done. Everyone was obviously taking it easy in order to complete the tour. With a dodgy sprint everyone crossed the line in a bunch sprint.
Dave: Given the ridiculous screaming that came from one rider shooting up the inside line during the sprint, as I sat in about 6th wheel trying to look for an opening before unleashing my all-powerful track legs (note – I do not have all-powerful track legs), I was happy just to stay upright in this sprint. Too many loose wheels for my liking.
Nick: Scott Gigante (racing in Saint Cloud shop kit) smashed the TT finishing 11 seconds behind the winner and putting himself in a rather good pozzy. Dave and I did shit TT’s, leaving us both around a minute down. Pathetic!
Our ITT specialist Nick in action!
Scott Gigante on a flyer.
Dave: Man, I was SMASHING that time trial. Absolutely flying!!! Then I started to think about my legs, and how much they were hurting, but it was alright as I was surely nearly done. 6km is nothing, right? Then I looked down and saw I’d travelled all of 500m. Then the guy who started 30 seconds behind me flew by in his orange tear-drop helmet, huge legs powering away. Fark. Bye bye GC.
Nick: Stage 3 was a lot of fun. What a course! The only bad thing was that Dave’s wheel touched my wheel and he went down. Because Dave is a mad dog, he straightened his bike out and finished the stage solo for fear of death. (Ed: Lols at you two knocking each other off!)
Dave: Yep, banger of a course. Riding through boulder world just southeast of Castlemaine was pretty sweet, especially as I was rolling along solo with barely a care in the world, soaking up the serenity. I wasn’t that happy an hour earlier though, when I went down after 30km. Turns out the loose wheel in the bunch was mine – a rookie mistake, a quick lapse in concentration, and my front wheel was overlapped and rubbing with Nick’s in front. Down I went, tearing up my left hand and banging my left knee, rolling over once or twice, and getting some gnarly bruises on my right hip and thigh.
My bars were at 45 degrees to the front wheel, and my right hood was pretty much sideways. I figured my tour was done right there. Steffo from Sunbury was in the follow car; “Hogan? You alright?” “Yeah, I’m fine, but my bike is fucked”. I didn’t really know what to do, so thought I may as well check my bike. With the adrenalin still flowing, I managed to straighten my hood, nearly punching myself in the face in the process. Nice one Dingus.
Got the bars straight, the wheels seemed true, so I jumped back on and started chasing. Death before DNF. No idea how long I was delayed, three or four minutes? I chased hard for the next 10km, hoping the peloton may have sat up, but no such luck. Eventually I caught up to Marco, another top Sunbury CC bloke (is there any other kind?), and we chatted for a while about his recent trip to the Giro. We soon caught another guy who’d been popped, but not long after I was back on my own, having left those two behind.
A leisurely ride became even more leisurely when, with 15km to go, Women’s A Grade flew past me chasing down a solo attack, only to then sit up and look at each other for the next 12km. I slotted in behind the follow car, and tried not to fall over from going so slow. I wanted to yell out; “Someone attack for fucks sake!” but with such a small bunch it was all cagey cat and mouse stuff. Fair enough, so I just enjoyed the cruise.
A few km’s before the stage end the women took off, and then D Grade caught me, a front group of 3 fairly flying, and clearly suffering. Then another small group, followed by a couple of ones and twos, all spittle and grunts and pain faces. Good to see The Climbing Cyclist up near the front, giving this racing thing a good crack.
Nick: The rest of stage 3 consisted of a couple of attempted breaks, including myself and Tom McDonough. We were shut down and it was a gnarly sprint finish. Scott came out with 2nd place for the day, putting himself in an even better spot.
Dave: I eventually rolled in 20 minutes down on C Grade winner, surprised to hear that the front bunch had still been 20 strong at the finish. I’d expected it to break up much more, with bigger time gaps. But this meant shit was going to be on for the final stage.
Nick: The last stage ended up being shortened to a 60k day instead of the original 90 due to fog and a delayed start. Everyone was pretty keen to make the man in yellow do all the work today, especially Col Bell (Dave: and who’s going to argue with Col?!). Scott, Tim Lier and I broke in the early stages and went on to get a 1.5 min gap on the field.
Dave: I sat in last wheel for the most of the day, happy to have a little more space to myself away from the other wheels. I couldn’t get in the drops due to my hand, so got distanced on each of the short descents before chasing back on up the next little rise. I was stoked to see Scott and Nick away in the break – whoever got the 2 KOMs on offer could win the KOM overall, and Scott only needed a handful of bonus seconds to push for a podium position on GC.
Of course, being last wheel meant I was dropped on the second lap up Bald Hill, and spent the next 10km chasing full gas to get back on, first with Col Bell, then picking up a few others, before another four big time trial lads who had been dropped on the climb caught us, and the eight of us rolled turns to get back on. It was all out, and this here was my race. I was determined to make it back to the bunch, and after a massive effort we eventually got back on, not long before turning onto Baynton Road for the last time.
Nick: We stayed away for the 1st 2 laps but were caught half way through the last. By this time Scott had collected the 2 KOMS and was feeling good. I was dropped like a sack of shit by the last climb, but Scott went on to take out 3rd for the stage putting himself in 2nd overall and 1st KOM. Good effort mate. Dave and I cruised through feeling happy to have completed such a great tour! In summing up, the 3 Day Tour was rad and riding bikes is sick fun. Thanks to Mat for buying us all beers with his B-grade winnings!
Dave: Yep, worth the pain for a pint of Holgate at the end! Cheers to all the organizers and volunteers. I’m not sure we realize how lucky we are to have races like this.
So I fronted up to Whyalla CC’s race on Saturday, the course was from Stirling North to Quorn and return. Probably none of those names mean anything to anyone apart from Quorn being a funny name for a town. I knew absolutely nothing about the course apart from one guy at work saying “it’s a bit hilly” – now for those of you that know: I don’t do hills. I do banking, but I don’t do hills.
Expectations were low but hopes were high as I hadn't done a road race with Whyalla so thought I might get a sweet handicap. Turned out to be moderately sweet but one of the guys in my bunch was a local and new the course well – so well in fact I believe he was determined for our bunch to ride it without breaking a sweat and would insist that we back it off before “the big climb”. I got kinda bored with this and believed it was only a matter of time before we got swamped so up the next climb I gave it a bit of “see you cunce later” and rode away for the next 15km.
However I then got bored with being alone, no one likes to be alone, and decided I’d probably bitten of more than I could chew and would like some mates for the return headwind. I backed off a little and my original group caught back on. I said sorry - all was forgiven. We spun around and headed back, at this point there was one solo dude in front that we never seemed to make any gain on but for a similar unknown reason, no one made ground on us.
In the last 10km me and an old guy dropped out 2 remaining companions and with that set up a showdown for the sprint. In the last km he sat on my wheel like he had done all race as I pondered the chances of getting out foxed by a dude twice my age. Perhaps it wasn’t his best foxing day because as soon as he came off my wheel the headwind blew him backward and I sailed in for 2nd.
The best bit of the day (apart from winning $14, well $6 if you take away the $8 entry) was all the pies, cakes and coke I could stuff down my throat – gotta love country races! Oh and for those of you that might think I was racing against a bunch of farmers on paddock bashers, think again. Of notable mention were a Venge with Di2, Cannondale Saeco Six13 with DA9000 and a new Ridley Noah with the intergrated brake thingys and 80mm carbons!
Here’s a photo of me about to do the world’s worst turn-around, some cakes and a big fucking parrot.
The first day of winter saw four of us head out to Woodend for the Mario Giramondo memorial handicap and what a banger it was. The weather was pretty miserable, Melbourne was flooded and as we headed out down the Calder it wasn’t looking too pretty - I myself was feeling pretty amped at the prospect of grim conditions.
Arriving in Woodend we had to wait around a bit because the commissaires where out checking the course for fog, something about visibility. This delay of course didn't bother Duggan or Spiro who were set up on the ergos under the team bus awning (Duggan’s old man’s van set up with a rad canopy). Mat and I decided that putting our kit on was enough of a warm up and instead took counsel from our Director Sportif, Jimmy Butler. By the time the Woodend fog had lifted and we rolled out to the start line Duggan and Spiro may as well have raced a crit.
Duggan, Spiro and I were off at 5 minutes, with Mat off chop at 1 minute 30. Limit had 25 minutes on Scratch which was going to be hard to get back as although the weather was wet. it was very still. The 5 minute group had seven riders, we all rolled turns well pushing a steady pace, giving Jimmy Butler high fives while he manned his corner. The second lap saw Spiro starting to fall off the back - no surprise really with all that time spent on the trainer...
The rest of the group kept working well; Duggan and I were loving riding in the rain. We didn't catch any groups but we were managing to hold off scratch. In the last lap and a half I was in the box; cheers to Duggan and Paul Randell for not letting me get dropped. With about 10 km to go we were caught by Scratch and Block who had joined together on the 2nd lap. I was pretty stoked with this because I was massively cooked and got to sit in till the end. Mat and Duggan ripped turns until the finish but it wasn't enough to bring back limit.
A tough day in the wet but all in all, racing bikes in the rain is fucking rad!
