We thought we'd ask our very own high performance coach, Jimmy Butler, to shed some light on some key issues for the team in public sphere so you could get a feel for what we, as serious racers, struggle with day-to-day...
- Jimmy, how important is colour co-ordination in your pre-race routine? How much time to you dedicate to this task?
Colour co-ordination and looking good in general are everything. Looks and style are all that matter in the sport of the gods (road cycling - only piss off MTB!). 5-7 minutes should be dictated to this before every training ride and 8.25 to 9.5 minutes every race day. One should also always be constantly checking their reflection in shop windows when riding in town
- Jimmy, not only are yo super pro, but you're also really handsome? Just how do you pull this off?
This happens to be a fine art, which I have somehow managed to perfect over the past few years. It involves carefully listening to all Bollywood’s (Mitch's) fashion and style tips and ignoring anything that comes out of Nick Smiths mouth! Also I must say that the consumption of a pear (not apple) cider helps considerably with the looks. While any Italian beer seems to put a bit more punch in your legs!
- Jimmy, if someone yells at you in the bunch for attacking or not pulling turns, how do you deal with it?
Well the issue of being told off for attacking seems to be only a temporally, issue as given a minute I’ll never see the Hubbard again. And as for not rolling turns, I prefer to tell them straight up “Listen mate my plan is to sit on and let you do the work, I’ll just roll you at the line” the common response is usually a shake of the head. He clearly did not understand.
- Jimmy, will this ridiculous fad of fluoro gear in the local bunches ever end? (and do pink tyres make you go faster?)
As long as Hollywood continues on the local seen it will never end. The question of whether it makes one faster is easily answered. If the fluoro gear is worn at the extremities of the body for example, bootie covers, eye wear or gloves, the answer is yes. If it is worn covering large portions of the body the cyclist is a disgrace and they will most likely get dropped. I happened to see a cyclist a few weeks back wearing long fingered fluoro gloves, but then they had short fingered gloves over the top! This is a big no no and that particular rider, who shall not be named, is going nowhere!
- Jimmy, chamois creme... yay or nay? Also, euro "tingle" or standard...
Any product or practice that cyclists in Europe indorse gets a big tick. So it’s a yes and either standard or euro tingle are acceptable. If the cream is applied by ones mistress or girlfriend it seems to work much better and your chances of dominating the race increase dramatically.
- Jimmy, have you ever had such a numb dick that you could slam it between a car door with no ill effects pain wise?
All the time.
For those not lucky enough to have Jimmy providing constant commentary on personal appearance and race tactics, we'll be providing top tips from the Boss periodically.